purpose in life

yes, teh purpose is not so clear to me right now. I am obviously lost. But I can try to make the best of the times and cards dealt to me. The things I recently noticed in myself.

I lack humility. My cup is full, I am gloating voer things that I;ve done, which is preventing me from doing more. When you are full and not that hungry you consume absorb less. Which is what is happening to me. I am gloating over the fact that I am very humble . which is not true humility. There is so many things that I don't know and dont do or ever did. I am looking outside and thinking there is so much I am missing out on. Intentions only are not good enough to gloat and be satisfied ith. Until or unles you deliver there's nothing to be proud of. I think I've had enough of the gloating period. Now its better to get in the act. and start striving for a new level of achievements. Sad thing is that it took me so long to realize that I was gloating.


Also I must practice control over myself. There are so many times when I dont want to do what I should be doing. I am not following the plans that I make. This is a moments half hearted pleasure, of following instinct, but comes back to sting you with a pang of guilt and of course the mess that it leaves behind. So I must, stick to the plan and it will take practice, regular practice.

I must humble myself and strive for greatness, through rigorous practice of self control.